16.3.11

regret

re·gret [ri-gret]
verb (used with object)
1. to feel sorrow or remorse for (an act, fault, disappointment, etc.): He no
sooner spoke than he regretted it.


2. to think of with a sense of loss: to regret one's vanished youth.

That would be me with most things I've done in the years past. I'm wondering how many years will past until I will lessen the number of things I regret.

1. Jessie. Too many things to regret, apologize, and never be forgiven for. I'm little better then Kira in her eyes I'm sure.

2. Joanna. Lashing out in anger when I never needed to. Though she was wrong I shouldn't have slammed her.

3. Heath. I never should have messed with that poor man. I never should have sent that letter. I wanted to hurt him the way he hurt him but I just sank to immaturity. I still think about him everyday and miss him worse then I should. I'm sure he thinks none of me at all. The saddest thing of all is that I came as close to loving him that I've ever come to loving another guy after David. I don't care if nobody believes me. I can't listen to certain bands and songs now because they remind me of him. I don't go to the movie theatre by my house anymore because I can't stand to be where we use to.


Apologizing and feeling awful changes nothing. I'm still the pathetic kid that nobody wants to be around. I don't blame them.

I hate spring break.

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